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Life

In Other News, Moving Sucks

Posted on March 26, 2012

As someone who’s lived in Los Angeles for over 15 years, I never thought I would live anywhere else. Sure, on occasion, I’ve imagined moving to New York or Austin or Portland (or somewhere even more exotic), but I never really thought I would leave LA.

But over the last few years, something changed. The city I loved started to annoy me. Then, grate on me. Then, I really started to dislike it intensely. It was an odd feeling to be sure and one I was sure I would never have. But, as they say, things change. LA and I had grown apart.

So, with that in mind and looking for new adventures, I packed up my stuff, grabbed Heather and her stuff after selling her place and moved South.

No, I haven’t moved to the “real” South, I’ve only moved South of LA and behind what people like to call “The Orange Curtain.” For the moment, H and I are renting a relatively new apartment that was originally built as a condo while we look for a house or similar.

But I gotta tell you, even though I really was looking forward to the move and really like the place and area we picked (Irvine, if you’re curious), the move itself was a pain in the ass that almost killed me.

I had not moved in quite a few years and the last time I did it I was apparently much better at it (and in better shape) as I don’t remember it being this difficult.

But this time, I really wasn’t very good at it. It really took a toll which I’m just now shaking off almost a week later. Before you ask, we had movers. They did all of the heavy lifting (and most of the light as well). It just seems to be such an overwhelming task this time.

I’m pretty sure almost everyone dislikes moving. Or, lets face it, hates it with a fiery passion hotter than a thousand suns. Even at its best, its very unpleasant. It really throws a wrench into your life even if you’re going to a place you really want to go and you have lots of help. It’s still a pain in the ass.

The unfortunate part is as much as I disliked having to move this time, I’m going to have to do it again this year once we find a more permanent place to live. Plus, I’m also going to have to move my Mom closer to us as well this year and vacate the house she’s lived in for over forty years.

Damn. And I thought I had it bad this time.

Ups and Downs

Posted on February 1, 2012

Well, so much for the great “let’s post my Instagram photos to my blog automagically” experiment. If you’ve been following this site the last couple days, you know it went horribly wrong and resulted in lots of the same thing being posted over and over again.

Not good. Made even more not good by the fact that this site is setup to automatically update my Twitter with new posts and that’s set to automatically post to my Facebook. Not good times a hundred thousand.

So, that meant a lot of extraneous posts and a whole slew of bullshit I needed to deal with today in addition to the ever increasing pile I already have allotted to me. But I’m not unhappy.

However, to read this site or my Twitter or Facebook you might get the impression I’m disgruntled, angry or otherwise unhappy. Not at all.

In fact, I’m not disgruntled, rarely angry and thousands of miles away from unhappy. Just ask anyone who knows me well and they’ll tell you. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

Welcome back. I tend to go the opposite direction of angry and in most cases, I just keep on being happy. I’m not saying I never feel down or sad, I do. Everyone does. Well, most everyone anyway. Probably not sociopaths. But they’re just weird.

Anyway, the truth is for a vast majority of the time I feel happy and I think life is pretty good. It has some ups and downs, sure, but to me that’s what makes it interesting.

Of course, I say this as an educated, white male living well above the poverty line in a city with great weather, great people and with a lot of opportunities for work, fun and to live life to the fullest. Yes, luck may be a factor too.

However, even with a lot of luck you still need to do something with the opportunities presented to you. You can’t just sit back and expect the world to come to you. It doesn’t work that way and at some point, if you’re still waiting, eventually you’re going to be disappointed.

The trick is to get out there and do something before that happens. That’s why I make sure I’m as busy as possible doing a variety of things that a love. I don’t want to look back later at my life and be an old man filled with regret (apologies to Christopher Nolan for cribbing that line).

That’s what helps me stay happy. It might not work for you but hell, it’s worth a try, right?

Let me know how it goes.

Monday Blues

Posted on January 23, 2012

It’s Monday. To most people that means heading back to work after a weekend that was too short during which they probably didn’t get to do what they really wanted to do and instead had to clean out the garage or (insert chore you’ve been avoiding for months here).

For me, however, Monday is pretty much just another day of the week.

Why do I say that? Well, I’m a person who works “freelance.” As in, I go from project to project, job to job, gig to gig and get paid for that gig. Once it’s over, I’m done and I move on. Or, hopefully the same people hire me again to do something else for them or, in some cases, more of the same.

I’m also a person who, if I don’t have someone paying me to do something right that moment (which happens, believe me), is probably doing something anyway. That means I pretty much work every day. I’m not complaining, mind you. I chose this way of life long ago and I’m sticking to it.

Monday, Friday, Thursday, Sunday, it doesn’t really matter. Chances are if I’m even marginally awake, I’m doing something. These days, most of that time is spent writing.

That doesn’t mean I’m sitting at the desktop or with the laptop pounding on the keys and actively writing a story, script, comic, blog post or whatever. To me, writing also encompasses all the stuff I do before and after the actual process of inputting the thing.

Outlining, breaking a story, thinking about characters, brainstorming, research, pre-writing, whatever. I don’t really have an “official” name for that time, I just lump it in with writing. That, in turn, I consider working.

I’ve heard a saying that goes something (or exactly) like this: “If you love what you do, you work every day of your life.”

Yep, that pretty much covers it.

The Importance of Doing Nothing

Posted on January 8, 2012

Unless you use a different calendar than I do (which is possible, I guess) you know today is Sunday. This day is also known as my favorite day of the week. You know this if you read my earlier post on that very subject.

Seeing as this is my favorite day of the week, what am I going to do with it you may wonder? The short answer, for this week at least, is nothing.

I’m a big fan of doing nothing, at least once in awhile. With all that goes on during the days and weeks and months of work, deadlines and life in general, when you have a chance to just sit, watch mindless TV, read a book or comic or write blog posts, I say take it.

I don’t have all that much to do right at the moment, especially today. I have work that needs to be done and deadlines coming up, but right at this moment, today, they are not urgent. I also don’t have any pressing social engagements, things I have to do for Heather or any children to worry about (at least not yet) so none of that is vying for my time today either.

These times don’t come along all that often, but when they do, it’s wrong to just ignore them. Plus, doing nothing has a lot of benefits.

It helps you recharge and get ready for the days and weeks of work ahead. It also helps you unplug from the computer, social media and all that that entails.

And, it helps you discover and explore new things like books you haven’t gotten to, comics you needed to read, all those neglected episodes of Firefly on Netflix or The Wire on HBO Go or any number of other pursuits that seem to always get relegated to “someday soon” due to life’s relentless pressure to do something else.

So, with that in mind, I choose to seize this opportunity and do nothing. It won’t last long, but it doesn’t have to. The trick is just to enjoy it while you can.

Doing nothing is kinda like life that way.

—

Two notes for those of you who’ve read this far down.

• Believer, my comic book project at Kickstarter, is doing pretty well after only a couple days. Check it out if you have a minute.

• I will not be going to CES this year for many reasons, but mostly because I just don’t really want to. I’m pretty sure if you asked most of the people at CES they would say they don’t want to be there either. Trust me, it’s not as fun as it seems.

Ass, Cash or Grass

Posted on January 4, 2012

Today was one of those long days where I spent the majority of my time doing that stuff I mentioned in a previous post instead of anything particularly creative. In other words, the creative side of my brain had to take a back seat to the practical side.

I don’t mind too much when that happens, even though I bitch about it. I just don’t it when it seems like that’s all I’m doing.

The truth is I do like to help people and at the risk of sounding a touch immodest, I’m pretty good at it. I guess it must fill some need of mine to solve puzzles or something.

It’s probably the same reason I like doing Sudoku. I need to get to the end and I need to know the answers. So, I keep looking for them.

Of course, it isn’t all about helping people and finding answers. I also like paying bills, buying cool toys and generally making a living. So, it’s off to the proverbial salt mines I go.

Don’t feel bad for me though. Even if I have experienced a lot of unpleasant things in the past few years, my life is still pretty good. Plus, there’s a whole bunch of people in the world with far bigger problems than I have so when I feel like bitching, I’m often compelled to keep my pie hole shut and just move on.

Obviously, that didn’t happen this week. These were extraordinary circumstances and I needed to get some stuff out. I don’t know if it will happen again but I don’t want this site to have that kind of focus too often.

I want it to be a happy place. Not the happiest place on Earth (I think that’s already taken anyway), but at least a place where people feel it’s okay to stop over for a bit and not get too bummed out. I don’t think that’s too much to ask and I will do my best to achieve it.

I realize at this juncture it’s tempting to thank me. But please, there’s no need. I do it because I care.

On a somewhat related note, keep an eye out for a new project from me and one of my favorite collaborators. It will be announced this week. I don’t want to spoil the surprise, but suffice it to say it’s going to be pretty cool and I’m very proud of how it’s going so far.

Watch this space (and a few other places) for all the details. Until then, I leave you in suspense.

—

As sometimes happens, the title of this post has almost nothing to do with the content. My apologies. I will try to do better next time.

A Few Words About Loss

Posted on January 3, 2012

I don’t want this post to turn into anything overly maudlin or depressing, but given recent events, I just wanted to say a few words about loss. I will try not to kill your buzz too much.

For the most part, I’ve been very fortunate in my life. I almost always get to work with great people, have a lot of good friends and caring people in my life, work on interesting and fun projects and generally speaking, up until recently, I’ve never had to experience any type of loss of a family member, friend or other generally catastrophic event.

Then, a few years ago, my father died.

A month later, one of my best fiends since childhood died. Then, I got divorced and had to completely change my living arrangements, how I viewed and lived my life and my feelings about the future. Two months ago my favorite Aunt died followed, this week, by my favorite Uncle.

But wait, there’s more. During the time my father was ill and around the time my childhood best friend died, I also had a brief period where I thought I was sick. This is something almost nobody knows.

In the end, it turned out to be nothing. But let me tell you, the time between when you first discover something and the Doctor tells you it’s nothing can seem like a fucking eternity.

I don’t recommend it.

My Uncle dying this week has brought to the surface a lot of feelings about death and loss. The sad fact is we’re all going to die someday. I hope for all of us that day is a long, long, long time from now. However, we just don’t really know.

This time two days ago my Uncle was planning a vacation with his family. He had gotten a diagnosis of Leukemia last year but it had responded to treatment and he was doing well. Then, he got sick. At first, it seemed like a cold but it got progressively worse. 48 hours later he was gone.

This is the part where I roll out the chestnuts and tell you that every moment of life is important. I don’t care if countless people have said it before, and better. Doesn’t make it any less important.

So, for those of you who still need to hear it (and the rest of you who think you don’t) here it is:

Make the most out of life because you never know how long you, or your loved ones, have. In other words, life is short. Get it? Good.

I know I promised not to be overly maudlin or depressing, so I’m trying to end on a high note. The good news is most of us will have a lot of years to live our lives to the fullest and every day is a new chance to do something great and wonderful for yourself, for others and to live your life to the fullest. Take that chance and run with it.

See, that wasn’t so bad.

Convergence and Balance

Posted on December 27, 2011

Man looking out window

I’ve often mentioned here that I seem to have my feet in two different worlds. There’s the world where I go forth and make money to buy the things I think I need, to pay my bills and to save for the child I don’t have yet’s college education.

There’s also the world where I fulfill my creative needs by writing or expressing myself in other ways. I also call this the “real work” world. If you’re a writer, you know what I’m talking about.

Most of the time those two worlds do not converge.

With 2011 winding down and with me being another year older (and presumably wiser), it’s occurred to me that I need to make those two worlds converge more frequently. In other words, how can I make more money doing that which creatively satisfies me?

I realize this is quite the dilemma for so early in the morning (I’m writing this at around 6AM Pacific time) but these are precisely the times when you tend to think about these types of weighty issues. I can’t help it, the thoughts just come to me and they need to be addressed — sleep or other considerations be dammed.

Returning to my point, I need to figure out a way (or ways) to make money doing what I love. I’m sure people out there must have faced a similar situation, so if you’re reading this and feeling inclined to help, chime on in.

Until help comes from unexpected but welcome corners of the Internets, I’ve gone ahead and formulated a plan on my own. Or, at least I’ve got an interim plan until something better comes to mind.

In truth, my plan is relatively simple as it involves doing pretty much what I already do and how I do it. The main difference is in how I will allocate my time during the day and what I will focus on.

For example, under this new plan I will now spend as much time writing something (a short story, script, blog post, etc.) as I do on the Internet. I include time spent on Facebook, Twitter, etc. in that as well. I also do this in hopes of reducing the time I spend reading Twitter, on Facebook or reading mindless blog posts.

Going along with that will be an attempt to “reduce the clutter” of my online information stream. In other words, I will visit fewer sites less frequently and try only to read those sites that feature what I consider to be “good” writing and not attention grabbing link bait disguised as writing.

I will also schedule my day better. I will allocate blocks of time to tasks and only do those tasks during that specific time. Of course, this will have to be somewhat flexible to allow for creative bursts of energy and inspiration so if I’m “on a roll” I don’t have to cut it off to fit a particular schedule.

Going along with that I will also have a definitive cutoff to the day when I won’t, for example, answer emails from clients or deal with other matters that don’t have anything to do with the creative world.

I think the term I’m looking for here is balance. Although, that may not be exactly applicable in this case. I’m not looking for balance, per se, I’m actually looking for a way to spend the vast majority of my time in that second, creative, world.

The best case is that those two worlds converge completely and I spend all of my work time doing those things which make me the happiest. If I could make a few bucks in the process, all the better.

Obviously, I’m still working on the full plan, but I feel pretty good about it so far. At least I’ve mostly identified the problem and are taking some steps to remedy it.

I know I can do better and I know this plan will evolve over time like any good one should. Stay tuned to see how the goes.

But until then, this is what I’ve got. And really, what did you expect at 6AM?

—

Note – I’m not sure what the pic above has to do with this particular topic. I just like it, okay?

Christmas Birthday 101

Posted on December 21, 2011

The holidays are upon us in earnest and Christmas is coming this Sunday. I’m also having a birthday this week too. In fact, it’s tomorrow (Thursday).

Before you feel too bad for me and express sympathies that my birthday must get forgotten due to its proximity to Christmas, I will make you feel better by telling you that in all the time I’ve been alive, I’ve never felt bad about having a birthday three days before Christmas.

There’s one reason for that (well, two). Harold and Dorothy. My parents.

My parents came into my life sorta late in theirs. They tried for several years to have a kid the old fashioned way, but in the end, for whatever reason, they were unsucessful. So, like countless others who wanted a child, but just couldn’t make it happen, they turned to adoption.

That’s where I came into the picture. My parents adopted me, sealed the deal in late November, I was born on December 22 and they brought me home to live with them on Christmas day.

Since that time, my parents, being the intelligent and thoughtful people they are, went to great effort to distinguish my birthday from Christmas. It was always considered a seperate day and talk of Christmas was put aside until it was over.

Sure, the house usually already had Christmas lights and decorations up (my father was like that), but that was not allowed to detract from my birthday. If my party was at the house, we celebrated in a room away from the tree and as much of the rest of the Christmas-centric decor as we could manage.

They were also really great at making sure I had separate birthday and Christmas gifts each year. My mom still does that to this day.

I have no doubt that when I see her this weekend she will make me open my birthday presents first and then make me wait for the Christmas presents until a respectable amount of time has passed. Somewhat of a traditionalist is Dorothy. If my dad were still alive, I’m sure he’d insist on the same thing.

The purpose of this missive is to say that I’ve been very fortunate to have these two people in my life. Whatever happened, they always put me first and made sure I never needed or wanted for anything.

I could not have asked for better people to show me the whys and wherefores of life. I just hope, if I ever have children of my own, I can do half as good a job as they did.

It’s a tough act to follow.

Looking For Inspiration

Posted on April 11, 2011

No matter what I’ve achieved in my life, occasionally I find myself in need of some inspiration or motivation (or both). Usually, whatever I need comes from inside me and I end up making it work somehow.

Other times, I need to look elsewhere for what I need. Today is one of those days. So, to help me move forward and do what I need to do, here’s a little inspiration from my man Steve Jobs.

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UF8uR6Z6KLc?rel=0&w=480&h=390]

Whatever you may think of him or Apple, he certainly knows his way around public speaking. We could all hope to be this good at something someday.

Money quote:

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice, heart and intuition.”

Yep. I needed that.

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